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19 things I’ve learnt in 19 years

Besides learning the obvious things that every functioning human being should know, these are 19 more obscure things I’ve learnt in 19 years.

1.Do not beat yourself up over things you didn’t do as well as you’d hoped or shouldn’t have done at all. Being angry at yourself will not change anything, just embrace the mistake and learn from it.

2. There is more to life than other people’s opinions.

3. Do not speak to yourself in a way that you would not accept from others. You are the only person you have to spend the rest of your life with, so why don’t you start loving yourself in such a way that other people know what you expect from them.  In the words of the great RuPaul, “If you can’t love yourself how the hell you gonna love somebody else.”

4. Not everyone suits the education system and that’s okay. Don’t let this stop you from harnassing your potential, you’ll find your place. 

5.Hold on to good friends, whilst continuing to make new ones. The people you surround yourself with is so important, they’ll either tear you down or give you the push you need. Same goes for romantic relationships, be with someone that supports your ambitions.

6.Days off are necessary – we’re blood and bones, not cogs and circuit boards. Sometimes what you need is to put your work away, have a nap and go for a walk. 

7. Tell the people you love, regularly that you love them. Our family has had its fair share of health scares, life is very unpredictable so appreciate people whilst you have them.

8. Stroke all dogs, every single one (Unless otherwise instructed by the owner).

9. Your appearance does not equate to your capabilities in other areas of your life. If you don’t want to wear make up, don’t. 

10. Cry often by yourself, with other people, at films – It doesn’t matter just empty those tear ducts. 

11. Laugh loudly at least once a day. 

12. Compliment others

13.Be in the moment, it is easy to become swept up in life. But when you hone in and focus on just being present, you’ll be living in that moment whilst you make it a memory. 

14. If everyone likes you then you’re doing something wrong.

15. Leap at opportunities, if not you’ll remain stagnant.

16.Be inquisitive – Always question everything. In a world where we tend to take everything at face value, it’s important we get down to the nitty-gritty truth of matters. But also, ask people silly questions. 

17. Gin is good for you – health wise maybe not but I’ve always had a great time when gin has been consumed.

18.Making yourself proud is important  – celebrate big and small achievements. 

19. Take photos of everything.

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Why is colourful hair good for the soul?

Women and men are growing tired of the stale and outdated ideals of attractiveness. Increasing numbers of people are deciding to give societal beauty norms the middle finger, by the means of peroxide power. To me coloured hair and piercings are too often equated to a persons intelligence or capability.

I get a weird sense of satisfaction when I’m underestimated on the basis of my looks, it drives me to work harder. In an odd way, I feel bad for those that would not employ, be friends with or have a relationship with someone on the premise of external appearance. You’re limiting yourself to a lifetime of beige.

In 2015, Returnofkings.com wrote a painfully inaccurate article. Illuminating their readers to “5 Reasons Why You Should Never Date A Girl With Dyed Hair”. Laughably, these reasons included 1) ‘They’re attention whores’ 2) ‘They’re impulsive’ 3) ‘They’re ugly’ 4) ‘They’re useless’ 5) ‘They’re degenerate leftists’.

“You need to think of your employment prospects.”

” Coloured hair is a turnoff. I prefer women to have a more natural look.”

” Why’d you do that to your poor hair?”

Meg Moore

“Coloured hair is exciting because it changes how you look, especially as I have blue eyes I feel like the colours I choose definitely bring them out. I feel confident being able to control these things and that I am able to make myself stand out visually how I choose to. I think in a small way it is a rebellion, not against my parents or anything but in an attitude because I am being different from the norm, even though lots of people have coloured hair.

Meg Moore @megmoor_e

I don’t like being looked at particularly but I think it makes me feel like by looking at me people know that I like difference and that by me having something different about me, I could be more accepting of others difference. I’ve become more aware of the disadvantages since having to think about a job and that something so trivial may affect my chances which is silly as I am still equally as capable but I think it’s still revealing my privilege bc some people don’t get jobs based on hair or looks that they can’t change such as colour of skin. On the other hand it’s just sick to have vibrant hair.” – Meg Moore, Basingstoke

Kila Caprani @kilagcaprani

“Basically for me having coloured hair is another way that I can express myself and feel more confident – and I find when I’m confident in myself I become so much more sure of myself and project my whole personality to people which I think is 100% good for the soul. Makes self love a much easier thing to aim for when you know you’re giving your truest self to people and that they love you for it! ” – Kila Caprani, Hull

“Colour runs through us, through mundane everyday tasks, through every journey you take and every decision you make. From the colour of the background on your phone screen, to the constant argument with your partner about the ideal colour of a cup of tea. Whether it’s through clothing, home decor or the shade of your hair, colour is one of the most obvious forms of self expression.

Ellie Martin @effiej

The colours we chose allow us to express who we are, tell our own personal stories and allow us to access our inner creativity. Every human is an artist in their own right and every artist has a story to tell. Changing up your hair once in a while with a colour that you feel really represents you, might give you the confidence you need to make other more serious life changes or simply just to hold your head up high as you walk down the street. 

I know it worked for me and as five wise women (and a whole lot of song writers) once said, ‘spice up your life’, you might enjoy it.” Ellie Martin, Salisbury

Ebony Palmer @_ebonypalmer

“Coloured hair is good for the soul because it made me the most confident I had ever felt, I felt radiant in colour, I didn’t want to feel like a plain Jane.” Ebony Palmer, Bournemouth

Milly Struthers @millystruthers1

“Coloured hair is good for the soul as it regenerates it, when ever I’m having a bad time I usually change my hair up for a fresh start and to get over with the problem I’m dealing with.” Milly Struthers, Poole

“I feel coloured hair is good for the soul because its another avenue in which allows you to express yourself. People experiment with hair colours for many reasons but personally I enjoy the freedom it gives me and the fact that it indirectly forces me to change my style I.e clothing from time to time in order to fit which ever colour I’ve chosen. People always have something to say about someone’s appearance so I think dying your hair, like other avenues of identity, is just another way of being yourself and sticking it to everyone else” Tiger Broughton, Brighton

Tiger Broughton @_tigerrose

Dear Returnofkings, 1) We’re not looking for anyones attention, we’re trying to love ourselves. 2) Yes, perhaps impulsive but why is that a problem? 3) None of us asked you to find us attractive 4) Are we useless? We’re artists, lawyers, dancers, doctors and students. 5) That my friends is a colossal assumption, founded on the basis of what information? Our political allegiances are none of your concern.